disintegrate

rate

I not stupid 2 was really good.
lynn and i cried buckets of tears out.
we need to learn how to appreciate pple and ourselves. (:

got the pictorial book already. lovelove. :D

-

I'm closing my eyes,
but I'm starting to see
While he's looking at you,

she's looking at me
The only thing it does is
just keep me away from you
Sure part of this place would cheer if I die,
but don't let them

take away your beautiful smile
take away your beautiful smile,
take away your beautiful smile.

backstreet's back, alright! it was the BESTBESTBESTBEST concert i have ever been too. My childhood dream was finally fufilled yesterday. it has been 8 long years waiting and it was worth every penny seeing them for the first time since been a fan of theirs. (: no words or actions can explain how i feel right now. from the days of calling myself mrs nick carter to buying every single magazines and albums they had till now, it was worth everything. it was worth the wait even though it was only a 2 hours long concert. i could not have ask for more but just simply reminiscing every memory i had of them as i sang along to every song.

call me 20. but their music has been a part of me since young and that is something that will never change. they grow, i grow. (: they will always be the greatest and my support for them will never ever ever change. <3

ARGGGGGGH! i am still on cloud nine. :D

pictures below.

Never gone, never far
In my heart is where you are
Always close, every day
Every step along the way
Even though for now
we've got to say goodbye
I know you will be
forever in my life
Never gone

...always in my heart.

i sat down and pondered about what has happened during this weekend. somehow i still find it hard to comprehand everything that has happened and everything that was said. life is always full of surprises, isnt it?

i had a great talk with greg, clara and jeff last night. And one thing i realised after the talk was that we all struggle with loving pple in church. it seems so hard to just love fully without a tinge of dislike in some parts of pple's characteristics.

..and then i did my Qt for the night.

"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything." - 1 John 3:16-20

bam! i found the answer!

sometimes we forget and sometimes we overlook our basic reasons of why we are Christians. That is part of been humans because we are imperfect. But i thank God for his grace for the little reminders he gives us each day. (:

He knows everything, all things great and small. it is hard to comprehand what He is doing in our lives and it is sometimes hard to wait. The answers He has for us may not be what we want in our lives but only time will tell.Only time will tell how much these answers will transform us into better servants for Him. So lets obey and abide by His will. Let His will be done and just follow. (:

i got 4/5 of my tutorial slots that i balloted for. luckily i have mindy for my second choice geog class. we are hoping that farisa can try to swap so that we can all be in the same class again. (: school has been sooooo boring. unoe how much i hate school so i am trying to be open right now and try to love it. but i cant help thinking of going home whenever i step into that place. gosh, what is wrong with me? never mind. i am pretty used to how it runs now so i dont really care anymore. 3 years will pass fast, i hope. (: maybe in 2 years time, i will change my mind and tell you that i love this school! (:

but i am contented.
i think i made the best choice to choose nus. i just need to learn to love. ( i struggle alot with that.)

-

here in my heart
there is a picture of us
together forever
unfaded and unbroken.

greg gave me the newly edited corrinne may's fly away album for my bdae. it has been a long time since i listened to her songs over and over again. her songs make me cry and laugh all the time. they make me think and they make me discover a bit more about myself each time i listen. that is what i love about her songs because they always have a way of saying that neverland is never too far away. it is okay to dream and believe. (:

it is like re-discovering Eden with
chocolate-coated rainbows and cotton candy skies

-

your night may be my day
but it is still the same side of the moon.

talked to clara on the phone till 3 am last night.
fell asleep at 4 and woke up at 10 feeling like a zombie.
dragged myself up to bathe and went shopping till 10 pm.
came back with new year outfits. (:
my feet are numb and i cant feel anything.
it is time to hit the bed and start sleeping.

goodnight world.

-

dont ever lose the wonder of the child
within your eyes.

i am not imperfect.
i did something horrible today and i feel really guilty about that.
sometimes i let my anger take control of everything i have learnt.
sometimes i let it control my life.

i am sorry, God.

all of a sudden, i dont feel worthy anymore.
i dont feel like i am worthy of coming back to YOU.
but it stuck upon me that it is because i was unworthy that is why you first chose me
you chose to love me first.

"In him, we were also chosen having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will in other that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be for the praise of his glory." - Eph 1:11

Be glorified.

a little less love,
a little less of everything.
but i am contented. (:
19.20

thanks for all those who msged me/ msn-ed me.
thanks for all your presents.
they will always be kept in my heart.
thank you all once again. (:

hello world.

-

even if the world falls i will say
above all, i live for YOUR glory.

I saw Him run to me,
He took me in His arms,
Held my head to his chest,
Said "My son's come home again!"
Lifted my face,
Wiped the tears from my eyes,
With forgiveness in His voice
I felt his love for me again.
He said "Son"He called me Son.
He said "Son, do you know I still love You?"
He ran to me.
And then I ran to Him.

-

that was when i realised that God ran to me first. how great is your love for me!

my modules for this semester. i am pretty happy about what i am going to study this sem. i just hope everything goes well. tutorial registration is coming up. darn it, that is another big headache. (:

Module Code : SSA1201
Module Title: SINGAPORE SOCIETY

Module Code : GE2219
Module Title: CLIMATE, WATER AND ENVIRONMENT

Module Code : GE2206
Module Title: POPULATION ANALYSIS IN GEOGRAPHY

Module Code : SW2104
Module Title: HUMAN DEVELOPMENT OVER THE LIFESPAN

Module Code : PS2249
Module Title: GOVERNMENT AND POLITICS OF SINGAPORE

a lot to look forward this week.
i cant believe i am turning 20 soon.
argh argh argh.
i am getting old. it is time to grow up too. (:

bidding today. i only got one of my module because i gave up bidding for the my engineering module so as to put more points into the spore sociology module. but luckily, it was worth it. =)

but now, i dont know what other module to do in replacement of the engine module. darn it, i cant have the best of both worlds after all? i really hope that i can find another gem module which i will be happy with. if not, i have to do another geog module or an english module.

i hate the CORS system. period.

but it is going to be okay. i am trusting Him. (:

-

God above all the world in motion
God above all my hopes and fears
And I don't care what the world throws at me now
I'm gonna be alright

i had a great time hanging out with the ny classmates.
i cant wait for our next outing. though it was only a few of us, i had a great time enjoying the company of pple that i miss. lets hope that there will be more outings to come. =)

-

i am glad i have found a friend in you.

happy new year.

i have been staying overnight at church friends' houses for the past two days. it was really enjoyable and i am glad that this dec hols have been fruitful. =)

so it is a new year. 2005 is history and welcome to 2006.

we shared about our new year resolutions during the stayover night party at jeff's house and it got me thinking of what i truly want to acheive this year.

let it be a year where i can seek and rely more on God.
let it be a year where i can strengthen my personal relationship with God.
let is be a year where i can keep a balance between school and church.
let it be a year where i can maintain with friendships forged this year and all those that i have make less time with last year.
let it be a year where i will learn to open up and adapt to NUS.
let it be a year where i will learn to love.
finally, let it be a year where i can find happiness and a heart of thanksgiving in everything that happens to me.

-

Let my walk speak loud
And my words be true
Let my life be whole
With my eyes on you
Lord I'm stepping out
From the comfort zone
Letting go of me,
Holding onto You

You are the centre of it all,
The universe declares in awe
Your majestyI surrender all
I make you The centre of my life
Lord, I respond with all I am
you placed in me the song
Of heavens melody
Your Majesty I live to sing Your song